


Voice in the Darkness

by Kate_MacKay



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-22
Updated: 2019-06-22
Packaged: 2020-05-16 15:36:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19321075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kate_MacKay/pseuds/Kate_MacKay
Summary: Every night, Peter sends a message to Gamora, hoping she is somewhere out there listening.





	Voice in the Darkness

**Author's Note:**

> This is nothing like I normally write. There’s no action/adventure. But this idea was floating around in my head since I saw Avengers: Endgame opening night. I also think it’s good to step out of my writing comfort zone now and then and try something new. I hope you like it.

 

_Day One_

The _Quadrant_ was quiet, except for the snores emanating from behind the door to Drax’s quarters. Quill walked down the dim corridor to the bridge and slumped into the captain’s chair. He couldn’t sleep. The world had suddenly become even more confusing than ever. Somehow he had missed five years. Gamora was alive but was Gamora from the past who had never met him or the other Guardians. Rocket and Nebula had explained it to him, but damn… It was all so weird and painful. The woman he loved, his best friend in the Universe, didn’t know him. She was probably just as confused as he was. But at least he had the others and their familiar friendship. She was adrift alone in the galaxy.

Quill wished Gamora knew she wasn’t alone. The Guardians were there for her. He would _always_ be there for her. Looking out at the multitude of stars, he wished the constellations could guide him in this strange new world.

Taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly, an impulse seized him. Quill switched on the _Quadrant’s_ transmitter and started talking.

“Hey, Gamora. I hope you can hear me. This world we’re in now is crazier than ever. I’m not going to pretend I know what’s going on. But I want you to know, I _need_ you to know, that we’re your family. I mean us, the Guardians of the Galaxy, are your family. But we’re real family, not dickheads who claim to be fathers. We’re family who yell at each other and argue, but we love each other, accept each other, and stand by each other. We’re here for you. I’m here for you, Gamora.

“I know it’s got to be strange, I know so much about you but you don’t know me or the others at all, so I thought I’d tell you about us and how we met. In our past but your would-have-been future. Man, this is weird, but you deserve to know.

“Our story starts on Xandar. No, actually before that. So you know about Infinity Stones?” Quill paused. “Of course you do. My bad. Our story actually starts with me on Morag looking for an Infinity Stone, only I didn’t know that’s what is was at the time. I also didn’t know this whack-job Kree named Ronan was looking for it, too. So I was on Morag…

“…and that’s how I got the Orb and ended up on Xandar. Tomorrow I’ll tell you how we first met. We’ll be on Spartax the next few days, so you know where to find us. There’s always a place for you here.”

Quill turned off the transmitter and sat quietly in the captain’s chair looking out at the stars. Gamora was out there somewhere. She hadn’t responded to the transmission, but maybe she heard it. Peter stood up and went to his quarters. The big bed he had shared with Gamora felt empty without her and his heart ached with sadness. At least he found some comfort believing that somewhere out there Gamora was listening.

* * *

_Day Two_

Although it was late, Quill heard Rocket humming a tune as he walked past the raccoon’s quarters. Then there was the sound of something heavy dropped and a sharp curse, followed by an “I am Groot.” Peter kept walking, but briefly wondered what sort of device Rocket was building now. Hopefully there wouldn’t be any more incidents that set fire to the ship.

Sitting in the captain’s chair on the bridge, Peter looked out at the busy spaceport where they had docked. The location of Spartax made it a shipping hub and no matter what time it was, the port was always bustling with activity.

Quill flipped on the transmitter. “Hey, Gamora. I left off the story last night on Xandar and this is where it gets good, because this is where I met you.

“I walked out if the Broker’s place and you were standing there. I saw you and I… I couldn’t even talk. That’s a rare thing. It was like a bolt of lightning hit me and I knew you were the one for me. Then you hit me.” Quill smiled at the memory. “It’s right after that we met Rocket and Groot…”

“…We’re still on Spartax, so you know where to find us. You are always welcome here. Goodnight, Gamora.”

* * *

_Day Three_

“… so we were sent to the Kyln, that nasty Nova Corps prison. That’s where we met Drax. He tried to kill you, but…

“…and Rocket’s a clever little raccoon. Oh, yeah. Forgot to tell you. He doesn’t like being called a raccoon. And, uh, don’t tell him I said he’s smart. I’ll never hear the end of it. Anyway, he figured out a way to escape and we ended up flying to Knowhere. I mean it’s somewhere, but it’s called Knowhere. It’s a weird illegal mining colony in the severed head of a Celestial and you wanted to sell the Orb to this creepy dude there called The Collector. I’ll tell you all about that tomorrow.

“We’re leaving Spartax and heading to Cassiar. It’s a good place to find work. I’ll let you know when we get there. Goodnight, Gamora.”

* * *

_Day Four_

“…That’s one of my favourite memories. Standing on that balcony, sharing my mom’s music with you for the first time. Here, let me play you that song.” Quill clicked on his Zune and the soft notes of _Fooled Around and Fell in Love_ filled the bridge. “As you listened to this song, I took your hand, leaned down to kiss you, and you pulled a knife on me! You held it to my throat and accused me of being, well, not respectful of women. I hate to admit it, but you were right. I wasn’t. But I changed. For you. You make me want to be a better man.

“Unfortunately, right after that, things got crazy. I’ll tell you about that tomorrow. We’ll arrive on Cassiar tomorrow, so you know where to find us. Goodnight, Gamora. I’ve always respected you.”

* * *

_Day Five_

“…seeing you floating in the coldness of space. I couldn’t leave you there. So I left my pod and gave you my mask. I figured I would die, but that didn’t matter. You did. Lucky me, Yondu showed up. Oh, yeah. You don’t know about Yondu yet. He wasn’t my real father, but he was my dad. Confusing, right?” Quill sighed quietly. “I guess I have plenty of time to tell you. So Yondu…”

* * *

_Day Eight_

“…my mom. She was great. Raising a kid as a single mother is tough. She worked hard, but we only ever had enough to just get by. Honestly, things haven’t really changed. We’ve saved the galaxy a few times, but never seem to get ahead. We’re always just surviving. But, you know, we got what counts. We have each other. Just like when I was a kid. Mom and I had each other and she found ways to show me how much she loved me. She showed me how to be happy with simple things. Fun things. Like music and dancing.” Quill paused and smiled as he relished the happy memories.

His expression became more sombre as he continued the story. “When I was eight, Mom got sick and, and this is another long story I’ll tell you some day. Short version—she died and that’s the night Yondu picked me up and took me into space…”

* * *

_Day Ten_

“…This is really getting convoluted. That’s life, I guess. Confusing. Messy. But when I get to share it with you, it’s beautiful.”

Quill leaned back in the captain’s chair and groaned softly. The allegedly easy job they had just completed was much harder than expected and he was sporting a fresh blaster graze on his ribs. The wound wasn’t serious, just annoying. He missed Gamora’s tender care and gentle reprimands to be more careful that somehow miraculously made him feel better.

“I’m trying to remember where I left off the main story. I think it was when we boarded Ronan’s ship…”

“…and then I beat Ronan in a dance-off. Totally legendary.” Peter paused as he smiled wryly to himself. “OK, so it wasn’t really legendary, but it was the only thing I could think of at the time.

“I think this is a good place to stop. I’ll tell you about the dance-off tomorrow. We picked up a job in Grasmosia, so we’re headed there. Just want you to know where to find us, if you want to.”

* * *

_Day Eleven_

“… and that’s how we got called the Guardians of the Galaxy and got our criminal records erased…”

* * *

_Day Twelve_

“…After we left Xandar, you and me talked a lot. We found out we shared a lot. Like crappy childhoods after our real parents died. I even got drunk once and told you this embarrassing story about how I pretended David Hasselhoff was my dad back when I was a kid.” Quill paused and smiled wistfully. “I know you have no clue who that is. He’s this actor and…

“…I miss being able to talk to you like that. We’re on Grasmosia now, so you know where to find us. Goodnight, Gamora. I miss you.”

* * *

_Day Sixteen_

“…then you said you were a warrior and an assassin and refused to dance with me. But I know you are so much more than what Thanos made you. I discovered you do dance and are damn good at it, too. That night, Rocket and Drax were out drinking and I put on this song.” Quill hit play on his Zune. “Sam Cooke, _Bring It On Home to Me_. Great song and perfect for our first dance together. We danced to it a few other times…”

Quietly, Mantis led the other Guardians to the bridge. She gestured to Quill sitting in the captain’s chair oblivious to their presence as he spoke into the transmitter.

“He does this every night,” Mantis informed the others. Concern lurked in her dark eyes. “I do not know if it is healthy. Should we stop him?”

Drax’s voice was uncharacteristically soft as he replied, “Leave him. We all bear our grief differently.”

Kraglin added, “Seems to calm him, thinkin’ he’s talkin’ to her.”

Nebula nodded. “Maybe my sister will hear him.”

“Yeah. Leave him alone,” Rocket ordered. “He’s lost damn near everything. Don’t also make him lose hope.” The raccoon waved the others out of the bridge, leaving Quill alone to finish his one-sided conversation with Gamora.

“I am Groot?” the youthful tree questioned sadly.

“No, life’s not fair,” Rocket replied.

* * *

_Day Twenty-seven_

“…We eventually found my real father. Actually, he found us. Oh, man. That whole thing sucked, but we did get two more family members—Mantis and Kraglin. I guess I should start at the beginning, when we were working for the Sovereign…”

* * *

_Day Thirty-nine_

“…and then you said, ‘It’s just some unspoken thing’…”

* * *

_Day Forty_

“…It stayed unspoken for a little while. You mean so much to me, I didn’t want to rush anything and risk our friendship. That friendship means more to me than anything. But things changed when we were staying at this resort on Xandar. We couldn’t afford it—I know I told you no matter how much we work we just scrape by—but the vacation was a gift from Nova Prime.

“Anyway, Rocket and Drax and the others went off drinking somewhere and while they were gone these crazy Kree terrorists took over the resort…”

* * *

_Day Forty-five_

“…You and Rocket managed to stop the bomb, but I was losing so much blood from getting stabbed I was sure I was dying. I didn’t want to die without telling you. I needed you to know without any doubt how much I love you. So I said it. I said, ‘I love you, Gamora.’ And as everything faded, my only regret was not having more time with you.

“I thought that was the end. I never thought I’d wake up. But after I did, you told me you loved me, too. You told me I was worth it—worth the pain and heartache that comes with love. And it does hurt. But it is _so_ worth it. Life is under no obligation to give us what we want or expect. And damn if life hasn’t given us a lot of shit. But it also gave me the Guardians and it gave me you and I am forever grateful for that. No matter how this ends. No matter if I never see you again, or if you never love me again. No matter how much it hurts, it’s worth it. _You_ are worth it.

“We’re still on Xandar, so you know where to find us. Goodnight, Gamora. I love you.”

* * *

_Day One Hundred Two_

“…I was brushing your hair and braiding it while you told me what you remembered about your mother. She kept a garden. You didn’t have a lot, so she grew all sorts of stuff for you to eat. But you said she also grew flowers called puawai that you loved. I’ve never seen them, but you said they were the same colour as the tips of your hair. Every place we went in the galaxy, I looked for those flowers. Someone told me they only grew on your homeworld, but that didn’t stop me from looking. I wish I could find you one of those flowers…”

* * *

_Day One Hundred Eighteen_

“…and that’s how I started to understand what Groot was saying…”

* * *

_Day One Hundred Fifty-nine_

“… sure, she’s a bit innocent and kind of naïve about some things, but Mantis can be a total badass, too. There was this time…”

* * *

_Day One Hundred Ninety-one_

“…I guess you could say Kraglin is like an older brother…”

* * *

_Day Two Hundred Eight_

“…That’s another great song,” Quill said as the music ended. “Although Drax would say…”

* * *

_Day Two Hundred Seventy_

“…but that’s your sister. She’s always threatening me. But when the chips are down, she’s always there to help us. Tomorrow I’ll tell you about this job we did for the Broker when she saved our butts. We’re on…”

* * *

_Day Two Hundred Ninety-four_

“…then you helped me back to the _Benatar_ and patched me up. I’ve always found that amazing about you. You are terrifying in a fight, or if I’ve done something stupid, but you are also so gentle. You are such an awesome woman.

“How about a song? Back on Terra, those radio stations I told you about would take requests and dedications. I’m going to dedicate this one to you.” Quill switched on the Zune. “Four Tops, _Reach Out I’ll be There_. Listen to the words…”

* * *

_Day Three Hundred Twenty_

“I like sitting on the bridge of the _Quadrant_ when everyone else is asleep. It’s nice and quiet and I can watch the stars. These days I like doing that while talking to you, picturing you out there somewhere listening to me. Wherever you are, I hope you’re happy. You deserve happiness and love.

“Goodnight, Gamora. We’re leaving Xandar and heading for Knowhere, so you know where to find us.”

* * *

_Day Three Hundred Twenty-three_

“…I don’t love you because of all the memories, though they are great. I love you because you are Gamora. You’re the deadliest woman in the galaxy but I know you’re also one of the most caring. You have a good heart. You want to do good things like your mom taught you to do with the strength your father, your _real_ father, gave you. You’re Gamora, who makes me want to be a better man. I’ve screwed up in life. Like screwed up a lot. But the best thing that ever happened to me was falling in love with you.

“I’m not in love with the memories. I’m not in love with what Thanos tried to make you. I’m not even in love with who you think you are and what you think you deserve. I’m in love with _you_ , Gamora, heart and soul.” Tears began to escape Quill’s green eyes but he kept talking. “I’ll always love you, no matter what.” He took a deep breath and wiped the tears from his face with the back of his hand.

“We’ll be on Knowhere tomorrow, so you know where to find us, if you want to.”

* * *

_Day Three Hundred Twenty-four_

Quill stood on the balcony on Knowhere that held so many memories for him. He gazed into the colourful, nebulous distance, happy memories pushing their way through the painful ones.

“Peter Quill,” a familiar voice said behind him.

Quill’s heart skipped a beat and he began to think he was dreaming. Slowly, not wanting to hope too much, he turned around. For a moment, speech eluded him. Gamora stood there calmly. She looked good. She looked beautiful. And she didn’t look like she wanted to stab or kick him. He couldn’t believe it.

“Gamora, are you really here?”

“You always tell me where to find you,” she replied.

“You were listening!” Peter said with surprise.

“For three hundred twenty-three days.” Gamora paused a moment, hesitating before she stated, “I would like to know something about you.”

“OK. Sure. Anything,” Quill agreed, still trying to believe Gamora was standing in front of him, wanting to talk.

“Your life has not been easy. You’ve endured many sorts of pain, yet cheerfully face each new day with hope. You accept others easily despite their flaws and failings. How?”

Peter shrugged. “Mom, I guess. I told you we didn’t have a lot, but she always found something good in life. And, you know, I kind of have to accept other people. I mean, look at me and how many times I’ve screwed up.”

Gamora was silent as she studied him critically. “No. You are not a failure.” He had an endearing sort of charm and was definitely a handsome man. But she knew now he was much more. “All you have told me these past three hundred twenty-three days show you are kind and caring, a protector and a good friend. You have the bearing of an honourable man.”

A wistful smile touched Quill’s lips.

Remembering his stories, Gamora asked, “Is this where you first shared your mother’s music with me?”

“Yeah.”

“The songs you play for me have pleasing melodies.”

A soft expression in his green eyes, Quill nodded.

Gamora looked around the balcony. The place was grimy, but the view was spectacular. Stars winked against a multicoloured nebula in the distance. Sparks drifted from somewhere above like celebratory fireworks. And there was Peter Quill. “So this is where I began to fall in love with you,” she reflected.

“You did?” Peter asked with surprise.

“I cannot be certain,” Gamora admitted. “I do not have those memories, but the way you describe it, the way you tell the story, I believe I did.” She paused for a long time and was uncharacteristically vulnerable when she added, “I think maybe… Do you think it can happen again?”

The tender expression in Quill’s green eyes gave Gamora a rare feeling of hope. “Yes,” he replied. “It can. _Definitely_.” He held out his hand.

Gamora stepped closer to him as her fingers intertwined with his.

 

~The End~

 

**Author's Note:**

> I have two more Guardians of the Galaxy stories outlined. These will be more of my typical longer action/adventure stories featuring all of the Guardians. I don’t know when I will get around to writing them, but after I do, I will be sure to post them here.
> 
> My thanks and best wishes to everyone who read this story.


End file.
